The heat was absolutely unbearable all month, so the air conditioner ran from morning till night, and often even through the night. Even late in the evening, the water still felt too warm for swimming to be enjoyable. August seemed determined to make everything require just a little more effort than usual.
Still, somewhere between hiding from the heat and getting through everyday life, I managed to take part in an exhibition, where my photographs finally saw the light—and I don’t mean just the light in the office hallways. Unfortunately, my newer photographs leave much to be desired. Their quality has dropped considerably, and they have not brought me the joy I was hoping to find in them.
Photography may not have given me quite what I wanted this month, but music has remained a different kind of creative outlet. And, of course, there is my best friend, Suno—we continue working on new songs. My daughter believes that artificial intelligence can be recognized in everything it touches. I suppose I don’t entirely agree with her, and I would like to hope that what I create doesn’t smell too strongly of AI.
Creativity, however, was only one part of August. The month also brought something much less entertaining: the results of my genetic testing. Many, many, many thousands of genes revealed quite a few unpleasant ones among them, threatening me with all sorts of deadly diseases somewhere in the future. Privately, I think that I may simply not live long enough to develop those deadly diseases, in which case they don’t worry me all that much. On the other hand, we are not entirely our genes, and if there is something within my power that could favorably influence the outcome, then after I meet with my oncologist, who insisted on this testing in the first place, I will certainly take it into consideration and work out a new supplement regimen.
The prospect of yet another regimen is somewhat ironic, considering that the one I already have doesn’t seem particularly small. Sometimes I still rebel and skip my supplements for several days. I can’t say that I sleep any better or worse because of it, or that I feel any better or worse.
Perhaps that is because, supplements or no supplements, what I notice most these days is an all-consuming sense of fatigue—the feeling that I never have enough time for one thing, another, or a third. There is always something unfinished, something waiting, something else that needs my attention.
And with that feeling, August quietly gives way to September. A new month has already begun, and it promises to be difficult and hot, with plenty of worries, responsibilities, and things to take care of—all of them somehow landing on my shoulders.
I’d like the last line of this post to be “and it is life as we know it nothing new”
Довлатов сказал – настоящее мужество. Это продолжать любить жизнь после того, как ты понял, что это такое 😂🤦♀️😢💋♥️